This is an urgent message to all dads from a dad. Mother’s Day is fast approaching!
Flower companies, Hallmark and jewelry stores have pulled out all the stops to advertise their Mother’s Day specials. Unless you have been on a deserted island for the last three weeks, with no phone, internet access or TV, then you have no excuse to “forget” about this special day for moms everywhere.
This article is not a reminder to remember your own mom on this day. That should be a no-brainer. The one person you absolutely cannot forget on Mother’s Day is the mother of your children.
If things are not going well in your relationship with the mother of your children and you’re already creating an excuse to not do anything for her on Mother’s Day, just remember this saying: “if momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” And with it being a national day of celebrating motherhood–she will never, ever forget.
Whether you are married to your kids’ mother or divorced from her, whether you are no longer in a romantic relationship with her or hardly on talking terms, as the father of your kids, it is up to you to make sure her children are prepared and ready to celebrate her on Mother’s Day.
The following six tips will help your kids honor their mom on Mother’s Day!
1. Don’t Wait ‘til the Last Minute! Mother’s Day is on Sunday. That gives you between now and Saturday night to figure out what her children will do for Mother’s Day. Preparation is the key to averting disaster. Restaurants are filling up their reservations for Sunday brunch right now. Greeting card displays are getting sparser as you read this. The selection for the “perfect” Mother’s Day gift is thinning out at this very moment. Set your kids up to be heroes to their mom on Sunday. Act now to get the details figured out!
2. Be Nice to the Girl! Mother’s Day only comes once a year. Regardless of any stresses going on in your life or problems in your relationship, be on your best behavior, ensure the peace and by all means necessary, on this special day, be kind to your kids’ mom. And make sure your kids are nice to their mom too!
3. Give Her a Break! Being a mom is a 24/7/365 job. On this day, Mother’s Day, let her have the day “off”. That doesn’t mean to put off doing housework, laundry, yard work, making meals, or whatever other domestic duties she usually does. This means to do her chores (preferably with the kids) so she doesn’t have double duty the day after Mother’s Day.
4. Make Sure They Tell Her Things She Wants to Hear! Nothing is more meaningful to a mother than to hear special statements from the mouths of her kids. “You’re the best mom ever!” “Thanks for all the ways you take care of me!” “I love you mom!” Even though she knows millions upon millions of moms around the world are hearing the same proclamations of love, the fact that her kids are telling her these things means the world to her.
5. Have Them Show Her How Special She Is! Every mom is different, and what makes them feel special is different. So your job is to know what will make her feel appreciated and honored, and set your kids up to succeed in delivering. Is it a homemade craft? Is it making a special meal? Is it spending time doing what she wants to do? Whatever it is, teach your kids that sacrificing a whole day for their mom will show her how much her daily sacrifices mean to them.
6. Make It a Day That She’ll Remember! On the Monday after, she’ll be sharing with family and friends about her Mother’s Day. Give her a memorable and meaningful day to boast about to others, and one that brings a smile to her face when she later reflects on the day. Don’t put pressure on the kids that it has to be a perfect day. Make it a day that she never wants to forget.
These tips will set you and your kids up to make their mom feel special, appreciated and honored. And if you want “bonus” points, build off the positivity of this day and take steps to invest in your relationship with her. A Marriage Education class or a Parent Education course will help improve your communication and conflict resolution skills, regardless of what condition your relationship is in right now.
When kids witness the relationship between their parents improve, they tend to be happier, more secure, and do better in school. Because when “momma’s happy, everyone’s happy.”
Find more practical ideas for Mother’s Day:
- Kids Offer 10 Ways to Make Mom Feel Special on Her Big Day >>
- Attention Dads: Mother’s Day is Coming Up >>
- How to Celebrate Mother’s Day >>
- Enrich your relationship with the mother of your children by attending a Relationship Education class or Parenting Education class near you >>
Jason is a nationally-recognized expert in building Healthy Marriage coalitions. He is the author of an interactive, premarital workbook for couples, Before “I Do” – Preparing for the Full Marriage Experience, and his most recent book, Facebook and Your Marriage, helps spouses understand the new digital age as well as protect their marriage. Jason has been happily married to Kelli Krafsky for 17 years, and they have four children.